No, you have NOT been sucked into a wormhole and spit out in the year 1998. Rob Zombie and Marilyn Manson are hitting the road together in September, taking the U.S. and Europe by storm. “Why did the most obvious tour take so long to happen?” asks Rob Zombie, and everyone ever. “Who knows? Who cares? It’s happening now.”

The “Twins Of Evil” tour kicks off on September 28 at the first annual Desert Uprising Festival in Phoenix — the U.S. leg ends on Halloween, fittingly enough, and continues in Europe in late November. KoRn frontman Jonathan Davis will support the tour as J Devil, his electro-metal alter ego. I repeat, you have NOT been sucked through time — Jonathan Davis, Rob Zombie, and Marilyn Manson touring together is an actual, real thing that is happening. These fellows will be tickling nostalgia glands at the following locations on the following dates:

28 Desert Uprising Festival, Ashley Pavilion, Phoenix, AZ
29 48 Hours Festival, Las Vegas, NV

1 USANA Amphitheatre, Salt Lake City, UT
2 1st Bank Center, Denver, CO
4 Topeka Expo Center, Topeka, KS
8 Pershing Auditorium, Lincoln, NE
9 Verizon Wireless Center, Mankato, MN
11 Allstate Arena, Chicago, IL
12 DTE Energy Music Theatre, Detroit, MI
13 US Cellular Coliseum, Bloomington, IL
15 Covelli Center, Youngstown, OH
16 The Armory, Rochester, NY
19 Susquehanna Bank Center, Camden, NJ
20 Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, CT
21 Verizon Wireless Arena, Manchester, NH
23 Agganis Arena, Boston, MA
25 Aaron’s Amphitheatre at Lakewood, Atlanta, GA
30 Reliant Arena, Houston, TX
31 Dallas, TX

(European Leg — all venues TBD)
26 London, UK
27 Manchester, UK
28 Glasgow SECC, UK
29 Birmingham, UK

1 Luxembourg
2 Bochum, Germany
3 Amsterdam, The Netherlands
5 Stockholm, Sweden
6 Copenhagen, Denmark
8 Vienna, Austria
9 Munich, Germany
10 Basel, Switzerland
12 Bologna, Italy